u/Beginning-Progress55

For the longest time, I used to think this was normal, but I'm trying to learn from my mistakes. I don't know if this is normal but I can go by months without talking to my siblings or family. We only talk when it's necessary, and I don't remember the last time I casually called or talked to them about my life/job/hobbies etc.

My family has somewhat accepted the fact that I'm not that social, and I don't conform to social norms like that but new people are always complaining about my behavior. To me, natural is better. I don't force myself to message people or call them just to hold up friendships/relationships. If I feel like it, I'll call or message, and it might go on for hours. I won't wish someone happy birthday just because nahi kia tou bura lagay ga. And in return, I won't expect any wishes either.

Is this normal for other Pakistanis on this sub? Do you guys relate to this, too? I feel like we've all had or have weird childhood experiences that shape who we are today. For me, being raw and genuine is important. I can't stand being fake or pretending to care about somebody or something when I don't. Because of this, people think I just don't care or I'm selfish but I genuinely think I do care and remember people but it's just very hard for me to "show" that I care. I don't do things for the sake of showing and I hate being who I'm not. If I genuinely like you, I will do things without being asked.

I'm looking for genuine opinions and advice. I want to figure out if I'm normal or if something is terribly wrong with me...

I'm just really disappointed at this point. For the last 8 months, I have been applying everywhere. I've exhausted almost every job portal at this point. Waking up to emails that start with "Unfortunately..." is very normal to me now and it has come to a point where I doubt my skills, abilities and self worth. Yes, its been that bad.

I've been seeing this really good job offer on LinkedIn for around 7 months. I keep applying to it, hoping to get a chance. I never got a response out of them. I told myself, "This is a big company, they must have a lot of applicants." So I kept applying whenever it popped up.

A week ago, I saw that my friend made it into the HR department of that company. Naturally, I was very happy for him. But I couldn't resist asking him about that job post. He took a few days, and he told me the truth just last night. He said the company doesn't need the position right now. And they already have an internal hire, they're just floating it on LinkedIn to "Stay in the market". For a second, I thought he was messing with me, but he said this is very common. If you're not actively posting job posts on LinkedIn, people forget about your company. So when you actually want to hire someone, people won't remember you as much. Some companies actually create fake jobs just for the same reason.

So you're telling me, for the past 7 months, I've been ringing the doorbell of an empty house? I'm here struggling with my self-worth, polishing my resume every week, curating personalized cover letters, wasting time looking up and messaging HR on LinkedIn - just to know that the job doesn't even exist for externals? How is any of this fair? Who's asking for accountability from these companies? I'm thinking about all the jobs I applied to over the past few months. How do I know which ones are real? I honestly don't feel like putting any effort into all this now.

If I didn't have my friend in HR, I would've probably told myself I'm not a good fit for this position. My application is so pathetic that HR won't even view my CV, despite me applying multiple times. Which is completely untrue.

I'd love to get maximum responses for this question. I'm seeing a lot of jobs where HR doesn't mention the pay. Instead, they ask you to reveal your expectations and range, possibly wanting people to undermine themselves.

I was stuck in a similar situation a while ago. HR bluntly said we haven't decided any range or budget so we're asking candidates about their expectations.

How do I make sure I receive a range from HR every single time?