u/Badkame

I’m crying so much , I can’t believe my best friend is gone, she left me after 4 years together.

I was okay for a while..

I should be more healed ,more independent and yet..I’m crying a river, I can’t believe she’s forever gone. I tell myself i’ll never feel that way with any other girls.

I feel so late in the dumpee timeline, most people at four months probably feel better , or atleast not crying. I broke no contact and told her all my feelings. I genuinely feel too emotional as a man. I feel like I should be stronger but a part of her will always haunt my brain.

I’m crying a lot writing this. Has anyone ever felt this low after 4 months+ in a long term relationship breakup? (3 years +)?

I feel incredibly alone..

Hey everyone, just wanted to come on here and talk about how things have changed in a weird way over the last few months. I come here less than before, I used to be here a lot after I broke up with my ex. (4 year relationship)

I'd like to start by saying that I don't feel like the world is ending anymore. I've regained a sense of independency towards myself. The girl whom I thought I'd end up with and that I thought I'd never get over is slowly fading in my head. Although I still miss her and want her close certain days due to small lingering feelings, loneliness and habit...but not out of love anymore.

My breakup is extremely different from most people, she was keeping contact with me for the last 4 months, we went max NC for a week only, that was our record. I started reaching out less and less because at first I wanted her to come back by her own to me.(Don't do that early on like I did, it puts your healing on stationary) We did hangout 4-5 times post breakup and I saw that nothing changed, she'd say she love me but wasn't ready to commit to me. That she needed "someone serious"...but I was pretty serious about her lol

After our last meeting, I started gradually seeing things that were wrong with her behavior of how she was treating me post breakup, she was using this push pull method, to keep me around by saying she misses me but she'd push by saying you deserve the world and that she's too busy now.

Fast forward to today, I've finally hit emotional exhaustion. I'm now starting to realize that I really want someone to love me and not play "avoidance" or "Push/Pull" games with me. I really wish her the best and I still did enjoy everything we've done together, but I think I know what I'm looking for in a girl, someone that will take me seriously and take care of my heart by being healthy with each other and face problems head on when something is wrong.

I want to give a final advice to the people fresh out of a breakup, because I'm starting to get out of the hole I've dug myself in over the last few months. I thought I wasn't going to be able to, I loved her with all my heart and I would think about her every single day, even to this day but it's in a different way now.

I know how hard it is to hear that things are over for you two, I'm sure you loved that person with all your heart because I know what it feels like to lose your best friend, your partner in crime and your lover. It feels like it's impossible and that the world is ending or even that you think that you'll never find this kind of reciprocal deep connection with another individual.

This is all false, it's just a temporary feeling and all you can do is focus on what you like, what you want to become and who truly love you around you.

AND ALSO...Time.

You cannot rush the grieving process,

some days it might feel easier than others,

some days it might feel like HELL...

But there's one thing I do know,

We will all make it at the end of the day,

hold on tight my friend, you got this :)