My therapist told me — if you don't speak up, no one will hear or see you. Well, Reddit... here I am. ( my Homework? 🤔 )
I am 38 years old. My entire life, since childhood in a small conservative town, I have hidden who I am. I lived these years as an "invisible man," always on guard, always wearing the mask of a "regular straight guy." I have never had a relationship, never had a boyfriend — simply because it was a matter of survival.
I was a combat medic. I went through war, through the abuse of my own fellow soldiers who found out my secret, and through persecution that lasted for years. They found me everywhere, even when I tried to start life over.
Now I am in the USA. I work, I am safe, and I am undergoing therapy for PTSD. And I finally realized: if I don't speak up now, I will remain alone forever. My story is not an attempt to complain; it’s an explanation of why, at 38, I am only now starting to look for love and a partner. I just want to be free.
If you have questions, feel free to ask. I hope this helps me finally find the strength to be myself.