u/Araragihitagikisshot

So I am feeling guilty about the resentful thoughts I have toward my girlfriend. For starters--she and I have been dating since like December, but in February she told me she got with I guy I knew 2 years ago who is like notoriously a loser. This guy does a bunch of cocaine, introduced my friend to cocaine, and my girlfriend told me this and we have already had several like conflicts over it and I have felt bad so I don't bring it up anymore, and she already has told me that it wasn't good, she regrets it, she just wanted someone to make out with, and he was the grossest person possible. She told me he had a micro which I didn't really care about, and that he only wanted to get at her because she was hot and in a sorority, and that he lead with that he was gonna be good in bed and he was terrible and he actually started tearing up because he couldn't get it up. I am embarrassed by her and resentful toward her because I think why would you tolerate such disrespect from such a loser, because this same guy said "I could never make you my girlfriend" during a hookup which she had like said drunkily was during sex, but when sober she told me it was after. She told me way too much information about it, and I know it was in February, but it can't help but make me upset. That guy was super promiscuous, and I remember him saying he goes to underclassmen events to predate on underclassmen. I genuinely get frustrated thinking about how she got with him because I think--I cannot believe your standards were that low and you like tolerated this, and I get people have moments like this, but like she has like almost no other experience spare for equally disrespectful guys. I really feel bad as I know logically it is unfair to hold it against her, and she regrets it, but it is just so gross to me. Like I have daily intrusive thoughts about it, and the worst part is that we are long distance so it only feels worse. I have only seen her for 5 days in Madrid--where she is right now, and then it will be 10 days in our hometown and then back to long distance again. It's so annoying because I can't even gauge whether or not this is worth withstanding because she's not even here. I feel bad, but like I really feel like even 2 years ago she should have known better, and granted thats being extreme, but even still I feel like there exists at least some filter--if he was that bad--and I believe he was--why get with him twice. Its a very embarrassing story.