The backstory for this is a lot, but I have 8 kids solo, but three (maybe 4, I suspect but he doesn't have a diagnosis) of those children are on the spectrum and have behavior issues.
The behaviors are escalating because the one child with the most behavior challenges of the bunch is influencing the rest of the kids. He kicks, screams, crawls around the hallways for shits and giggles.
Consequences don't work, rewards work sometimes, but if he chooses to not care about it then it's up in the air. Whatever he doesn't earn because of his behavior is just fuel for a future tantrum. And a lot of it is attention seeking behavior. I recognize some of it is the need for control because his home life is shit. I put my notice in because I'm overwhelmed and burned out.
I praise him, I give him love, I play with him but because of his fucked up home life it is never enough. It's almost like being held hostage in the classroom by a 4 year old. And he changes the whole energy of the classroom because he can do all of this shit and the kids see that he will leave and come right back to playing. So why shouldn't they do it too?
Admin tells me to ask for help, but then the help doesn't really help. He leaves the classroom, gets pats and cuddles like I'm the monster he needs to be protected from. Then, doesn't want to come back to my classroom because he just wants the one on one attention. I cannot give him one to one attention all day long. I'm just one person.
I put in my notice in April for my last day to be May 22nd. They called me into the office and asked if I could hold on three extra weeks until the kids do their graduation (June 12) since my kids have been working hard on their bit.
I don't think I'm going to make it that long. Today he started up during bathroom transition before nap. No catalyst, just shits and giggles. Crawling around the hallway (all of the classes share bathrooms in the hallway). Running away from the group. I have a friend I am trying to potty train who needed cleaning off and I tried to get admin to take him, but they were out of the building setting up a Teacher's Appreciation Week lunch for us. The support staff that were in the building were being pulled everywhere and couldn't take a child who is mid-tantrum.
One of my other kids saw him acting up, so he fell out on the ground and refused to move while the other is mid tantrum. After so much begging, I ended up potato sack carrying them both down the hallway so I could get the other kids to the classroom. Because I am one person and these are the behaviors that admin saw me dealing with since August.
I do not think I'm going to last until June 12th. To say this has been a hard year is an understatement. I am done with teaching. I want to quit today.
I have the worst anxiety going to work. I have developed tremors, and I feel like I failed as an educator because I only have 8 kids. I'm in ratio. I have dealt with challenging behaviors before. I should be able to deal with it. I have been at this almost 15 years. I thought I was a good teacher. But I go home, or go to the car or sit at the desk and cry.
TL;DR: Challenging behaviors are beginning to be too much. Admin asked
me to wait until the 12th of June, but I don't think I'm going to make it that long. I am on break now and don't even want to go back because I know he is still giving my relief hell. Should I quit?