u/Appropriate_Pause_97

I’m a straight guy. I did something that could make that statement questionable. I went out one night and drank more than plenty. A gay guy was part of our group. Later on at one of the clubs I don’t know what the situation was but I stuck my tongue out and the gay dude licked it not once but apparently twice and apparently I stuck my tongue out the second time. I unfortunately remember it happening. I don’t remember it well it’s very fuzzy and I thought it was a nightmare but the next day my coworker told me about it again so it unfortunately wasn’t. I don’t know what led up to it nor what happened afterwards but I remember enough to know it did happen and it’s eating me alive. It’s making me question whether I’m actually straight. I have an absolute 100% confidence that I’m into women and that the thought of being or doing something actually gay is sickening to my stomach but even with that, what could have possibly compelled me to do such thing? Thankfully that was the only questionable thing I did that night and thankfully it happened after desperately trying to get at one of the girls that worked there. I’m not sure if I thought it was funny or if they had told me no balls, they already know that when I’m drinking it’s very easy to get me to do something whenever they say you won’t or no balls or you’re being a bitch. The unfortunate part was that I was with other coworkers as well, it was 2 other girls. Disclaimer: don’t get me wrong I have no problems with gays or the concept of being gay. The only reasons I’m stopping myself from scratching the roof of my mouth with a 12 gauge is because the way I see it I’ve stuck my tongue in worse places lol. I was in the military so I’ve eaten expired food, I’ve been so hungry that I’ve ate food off the ground after it fell, I eat 🐈, I’ve shared cigarettes, vapes and blunts with other dudes and none of that I’m ashamed of. So I’m figuring ehh what the hell at least I didn’t make out with the guy, now that I would’ve actually made me do something I couldn’t comeback from. But at the same time doing something like that with an actual gay dude is where it’s making me question my existence. To some it may not seem like a big deal but what I’m questioning is a lot more than just having done something questionable. I work with the dude, knows some of my family because other family works with me too, other coworkers were present, it was at a well lit club so other could’ve seen, and his sister who I’ve flirted with plenty was also there. Should I just take this one on the jaw and move on? Should I find a new job? Should I move across the world and leave everything I know behind?