Friendship breakup
I had a childhood best friend who I’d never thought I’d lose, and I think it was mainly my fault for the friendship ending. Basically towards the end of the friendship I wasn’t able to be there for them like I usually was because I was dealing with my own personal stuff which caused me to be extremely emotionally detached. I never told them because I didn’t want to bother them since they were already struggling and I just kept it to myself. I kept hanging out with them and talking to them, hoping that the conversation would flow naturally but it just didn’t. The only person I felt safe to speak about this with was my ex who I’m no longer with. She ended the friendship because of the way I was behaving (distant, not really there) and I don’t blame her. We had another friend in our trio who was actively there for her and being a great friend. I felt extremely guilty that I wasn’t showing up. I’ve learned not to tear myself up about it, but pretty much everyone turned on me and It’s been really lonely coping with the aftermath of the loss of these people in my life. I’m only 20 so I know I’ll probably meet new people, but I can’t deny I had a lot of fun with them.