Tw for talk of verbal and physical abuse. And very long post
My sister abused me pretty much my entire childhood. She was always in and out of mental hospitals growing up for being a danger to herself and others. I never saw her much but when I did she was awful to me, verbally and physically abused me everyday I saw her. For about seven years now she says she’s better and I guess it’s a little more quiet. For me. She and my brother in law who I’m going to call John to make this easier have lived with my mom and I since 2021 and I always hear her yelling and throwing stuff in their room, so I knew she didn’t like fully get better and still had problems but now we’ve moved and the walls are thinner and my room is closer, so I hear everything. She had my nephew in 2025 and ever since he was born everything has gone back to square one. The house is never quiet, never at peace. I hear her screaming at John and hitting/throwing things at him every single day, every single night. There are so far 4 holes in the walls since a year of living here.
She’s said some pretty bad stuff about me and my father in the past two years so I cut her off and don’t talk to her unless I absolutely have to but I was excited to have a lil nephew and tried to be there that which was hard because I was absolutely not there for HER. Anyways she’s fucking insane and gets physically violent with John while the baby is in the room or even in his arms. I have to BEG my mom to say anything, John is an absolute push over and defends her too much. Whenever I’ve tried confronting her she acts like everything is fine and like she’s never hit or yelled at anybody before. And no one is taking this seriously, I cannot believe it. Surely all the screaming and banging I hear is all in my head right? Surely mom and John wouldn’t be so heartless to rather watch the world burn than to argue with my sister right? I’m so fucking angry because no one gives a fuck. Fine, so what if no one cares that she abused me, used to it. Fine, so what if mom doesn’t care that John is getting abused, not her son. Fine, so what if John just takes the hits and endures the horrible things she says. But that’s a fucking new born baby. That’s my nephew. His first birthday is coming up this month, he’s young enough for this to not stick with him. He’s young enough to separate from his mother and still grow up okay. If she could abuse me my entire childhood and deny it, abuse John their entire relationship and deny it, (verbally) abuse mom her entire adulthood and deny it, what makes you think she wouldn’t do the same to her son? She’s going to abuse that baby. How dare they not care. How dare they not do anything. It has to be in my head right?
I know she’s an abuser. She always has been. I know how horrible she is but my own psychosis and shit has been getting a lot worse. And I truly can’t believe my mom and John could be so heartless. Like that’s your son. Grandson. That’s a baby. John has always been such a good guy not just to my sister but to everybody he ever speaks to. He’s always been caring. My mom is harsh but she always speaks up when she feels she has to. I never would’ve thought she’d just let this go. She says now “ugh I just don’t want to start another argument with her” when I tell her she needs to say something or do something about what’s going on. It can’t be real.
I know I should do something but what? I have no proof other than the holes in the walls, which they’ve already made innocent excuses for. I want this baby to have a good life but we all live together so none of us can take care of him alone. My sister is on disability and my mom is technically still her guardian, if she manages to get custody then the baby would still be my sisters anyway. I’m in no financial position to take care of a baby, especially no mental state to. I know I wouldn’t end up treating that baby well and I would end up freaking out. I can’t do it. John could. I don’t know why he still lets this happen. Maybe because it isn’t even happening. I feel crazy. But I know my sister is crazier, I just know it.
What do I do