u/Apprehensive-Mud9572

For starters, my family have a very healthy relationship esp with eachother and all. So i have been thinking of getting peoples opinions about this becs i think sometimes im just overthinking or nah

( its alot of reading so pls take ur time)

My mom has alot of medical issues, nth severe alhamdulillah, but like has consistant foot pain for standing alot and doing chores and cooking and all, she was always pretty hard working and active in house chores before marrage aswell. She randomly gets weird hand pain to the point she stops wht shes doing and bares it then goes, then to work right after, its been pretty consistant and she said to my dad alot that she has pending doctor visits she needs to get done ( pending as in she had back pain, foot pain suddenly a muscle is pulled sort of thing) she complains to , sometimes even infront of us, and my dad just ignores it, not entirely but sort of like "ohhh i too u to not work a lot, do some " and sortof just shuts the topic after that.

Now pls before going to conclusion, me and my sibling helps her out, daily chores are divided in us (vacumme, mopping, laundry, washing dishes and allatt) but soemtimes its abit innconsistannt due to our exam season rn.

Now finally my dad took her to hospital, and she got alot of deficiencies and a lot more mediciness. mom was complaining at the dinner only if he could've taken her earlier we could've sorted it out and all and dad went back with same argument, i stepped in becs im old enough to see the problem here and wanted to speak up.

I went in and told "bro don't delay her medical stuff and esp at her age rn" sortof way and dad went all out on us, "y r u telling me this? I too her not to work alot and its on u guys too u guys don't help her, she has to i eeen told her to exercise and rest'".

(Me and my dad have a really good relationship we share everything and all)

I was pissed becs i clearly told we r doing it.. okay, but this isssue is not on us, its on u to take her on time, not make her wait thru pain and all.

We went back and forth until i shutup ( it wasnt like an argument argument, he knows very well i don't hold back in these matters and all), he just went bad on us, not helping her and all, and i faced him a look of 'ugh u aren't getting it are u?' and then he stepped away.

The point is alhamdulillah we r financially able not to delay these things, its just that this had happens many many times now, he doesnt takes moms medical stuff srsly until she pass out or is in bed. The had a rough Time in early marriage but they love each other ths for sure, but there are things my mom tells about my dad that pisses me off so much that i would never marry a guy like that. To summarize, he is an absolute best father, but not a good husband. Becs i have noticed stuffs, talked with him but these things r still there.

He isnt abusive of anything like that, he just doesn't payes attention too these type of things when its on my moms, like one Time we and dad were discussion on how he is teaching cycling to my youngest sib, and my mom under her great said "bachoo ko to sub khud say sikah lay tay hay" it wasn't a jelouse/joking way, but a more disappointing/complainnng way, we heard and me and my sister sided eye eachother.

Honeslty if it was my husband i would've argued and complained until i get it, but for her she told me she tried so many Times that now its pointless. My mom always said he changed alot after kids like became way softer and way chill.

I love my both parents to death and they do same, but these are some things that gets under my skin and i cant stay quite in these. Am i overreacting? I really care about my mom she's alrr on lifelong pillss..

Pls give ur advice. Jazakallah

For starters, my family have a very healthy relationship esp with eachother and all. So i have been thinking of getting peoples opinions about this becs i think sometimes im just overthinking or nah

( its alot of reading so pls take ur time)

My mom has alot of medical issues, nth severe alhamdulillah, but like has consistant foot pain for standing alot and doing chores and cooking and all, she was always pretty hard working and active in house chores before marrage aswell. She randomly gets weird hand pain to the point she stops wht shes doing and bares it then goes, then to work right after, its been pretty consistant and she said to my dad alot that she has pending doctor visits she needs to get done ( pending as in she had back pain, foot pain suddenly a muscle is pulled sort of thing) she complains to , sometimes even infront of us, and my dad just ignores it, not entirely but sort of like "ohhh i too u to not work a lot, do some " and sortof just shuts the topic after that.

Now pls before going to conclusion, me and my sibling helps her out, daily chores are divided in us (vacumme, mopping, laundry, washing dishes and allatt) but soemtimes its abit innconsistannt due to our exam season rn.

Now finally my dad took her to hospital, and she got alot of deficiencies and a lot more mediciness. mom was complaining at the dinner only if he could've taken her earlier we could've sorted it out and all and dad went back with same argument, i stepped in becs im old enough to see the problem here and wanted to speak up.

I went in and told "bro don't delay her medical stuff and esp at her age rn" sortof way and dad went all out on us, "y r u telling me this? I too her not to work alot and its on u guys too u guys don't help her, she has to i eeen told her to exercise and rest'".

(Me and my dad have a really good relationship we share everything and all)

I was pissed becs i clearly told we r doing it.. okay, but this isssue is not on us, its on u to take her on time, not make her wait thru pain and all.

We went back and forth until i shutup ( it wasnt like an argument argument, he knows very well i don't hold back in these matters and all), he just went bad on us, not helping her and all, and i faced him a look of 'ugh u aren't getting it are u?' and then he stepped away.

The point is alhamdulillah we r financially able not to delay these things, its just that this had happens many many times now, he doesnt takes moms medical stuff srsly until she pass out or is in bed. The had a rough Time in early marriage but they love each other ths for sure, but there are things my mom tells about my dad that pisses me off so much that i would never marry a guy like that. To summarize, he is an absolute best father, but not a good husband. Becs i have noticed stuffs, talked with him but these things r still there.

He isnt abusive of anything like that, he just doesn't payes attention too these type of things when its on my moms, like one Time we and dad were discussion on how he is teaching cycling to my youngest sib, and my mom under her great said "bachoo ko to sub khud say sikah lay tay hay" it wasn't a jelouse/joking way, but a more disappointing/complainnng way, we heard and me and my sister sided eye eachother.

Honeslty if it was my husband i would've argued and complained until i get it, but for her she told me she tried so many Times that now its pointless. My mom always said he changed alot after kids like became way softer and way chill.

I love my both parents to death and they do same, but these are some things that gets under my skin and i cant stay quite in these. Am i overreacting? I really care about my mom she's alrr on lifelong pillss..

Pls give ur advice. Jazakallah