29F Single most of my 20s </3
I’m 29F and posting my chart because I’m trying to understand my patterns in love and whether they’re something I can grow beyond. I’ve always deeply wanted a stable, loyal, emotionally secure relationship, but my actual romantic experiences have felt much more confusing and intense than that. I’ve only had 2 short relationships and have spent most of my life single, which has left me feeling quite lonely at times and worried I may never fully figure this area of life out. (I have a good job and amazing friends, I’m close with my siblings, I’m building savings and potentially looking to move from London to Canada for a short while, just for fun - so other areas of my life are going relatively well.)
I tend to fall hard emotionally, become very anxious in the early stages of dating, and seem drawn to people or dynamics that feel emotionally intense but ultimately destabilising or unavailable in some way. I crave closeness and commitment, but I also seem to get stuck in uncertainty, overthinking and fear of rejection. I’m trying to understand whether my chart reflects this pattern, what healthy love might actually look like for me, and how I can stop confusing emotional intensity with genuine compatibility and security. Any advice appreciated :)