Am I the asshole for ruining our first date over a religion discussion?
Quick background: I’m 26 and have been single for 2 years. I’ve been trying dating apps here and there cause, why not?. Anyways, i live in GCC atm, so most people here are Muslim.
I matched with this guy on a dating app. Nothing crazy at first—we exchanged numbers and just had normal conversations. No flirting, nothing sexual. Eventually, we decided to meet up over the weekend.
He picked me up, and we went to a cute café downtown. The date actually started really well. After that, we went to a popular landmark nearby since it was late and quiet. We talked about work, future plans, and eventually relationships.
At one point, he asked if I was interested in being in a relationship right now. I told him honestly that I don’t want to get into something I know won’t work. I explained that I wouldn’t convert religions for someone, and that coming from a mixed-religion household, I’ve seen how hard it can be—especially for kids. I said I don’t want that for my future family.
He said it wasn’t a big deal, but I stood firm and said my answer wouldn’t change. We moved on from that and continued talking normally.
Then we got into a deeper discussion about religion. It was actually going well—sharing perspectives, asking questions, no judgment. We were vibing.
Then I asked him, out of genuine curiosity, why multiple wives are allowed in Islam.
He answered by saying it’s about “multiplying” (like Adam and Eve) as God instruct them to do. I said that made sense, but I also mentioned something I had read before—that one of the reason it was permitted was historically due to war, where many men died, leaving widows and orphans who needed protection.
That’s where things shifted.
He didn’t directly say I was wrong, but he kept pushing his explanation and didn’t acknowledge mine at all. I tried to clarify my point, but he kept repeating himself. So I asked if we could just check the Qur’an for context. He said we didn’t need to.
I still looked it up, and what I said was one of the reasons. I showed him, but instead of acknowledging it, he told me to read other parts.
At that point, I got frustrated. Not because I needed to be right—but because it felt like he refused to even consider my point or meet me halfway.
I told him I wanted to go home because the conversation wasn’t going anywhere. I turned away because I was honestly getting emotional and didn’t want to escalate things.
I told him clearly I wasn’t upset about being right or wrong—I was upset because he wouldn’t let the conversation go and kept trying to prove his side.
He still insisted we were “just talking,” but it didn’t feel like that anymore.
We stayed quiet the rest of the ride. He dropped me off, I said thanks, went home, turned off my phone, and went to sleep.
So… am I the asshole for ending the date like that?