Feeling left out in a friendship after being there for them for years
I have a friend I’ve been close to for around 3 years. During that time, she used to vent to me a lot about issues with two of her other close Dorm mates, especially saying one of them was selfish and only thought about herself.
Over the last year, my friend and that same girl started living together. I genuinely don’t have a problem with their friendship, but lately I’ve started feeling emotionally left out. Whenever I’m with them, it feels like they’re in their own world talking and laughing while I’m just there.
What hurts more is that our friendship itself feels different now. She rarely texts me unless she needs help with something or is bored and her other friend isn’t around. I’ve realized I’m almost always the one initiating conversations, checking in, and being emotionally available.
One time I was visibly quiet because I felt left out, and later she told me she didn’t understand why I was upset because “it was just her and her friend” and there was nothing to be hurt about. That made me question whether I’m overreacting.
I can’t tell if I’m being too sensitive/attached or if this friendship has genuinely become one-sided. Right now I’m thinking of stepping back emotionally, stopping myself from always reaching out first, and focusing more on my own life and career instead of overinvesting in this friendship.