Had a good experience girlmoding at a party
This sub is always filled with doom pills and despair so I figured I'd share a good experience I had. And I'm currently bored waiting for my car's oil to get changed.
A cis male friend's birthday is the day before mine. I've known him since middle school and we're in our 20's now. I didn't wanna have a party or anything, but his sister threw one for him on my birthday and he said I could come and it would be like a party for both of us.
I do not pass but I always girlmode. Always full makeup, chrome powder nails, women's clothing, and a pushup bra which actually gives me nice cleavage. But I'm 6'2, size 13 men's shoes, failing at voice training, and have very wide shoulders. Hon ✅
I've had a hard time asking people to call me Alice and use she/her pronouns. I always get really in my head about it, lose confidence, and default to deadname. Especially with friends of friends, I have this weird fear that I'll make my friend look bad if I reveal myself as trans by using a female name, as if the makeup, long hair, and small tits don't already out me as trans 😂
I parked my car and started walking up to the house. This guy who met me before as male deadname says, "Hey Alice, you can head right in, the door's unlocked." My friend had already made sure everyone knew to call me Alice and not deadname. It was so nice not having to introduce myself or correct anyone on my chosen name. I'm so grateful my friend actually did that for me. I expected him to have a hard time getting used to the new name and constantly dead name me at first. So far he hasn't deadnamed me once.
This guy at the party was talking to me and being super friendly. He told me he was pan. He had some pretty sick looking eyeliner. He had met me before as male deadname but he didn't recognize me and thought we were meeting for the first time. He was like "You use she/her pronouns right?" I said yes but I don't really care too much about pronouns. He told me that I should care, that I definitely looked like a she/her, and that I shouldn't be afraid to correct people on that. Clearly I didn't pass bc he asked my pronouns, but that gave me so much confidence even if he was just being nice. He complimented my makeup and nails too.
Later that night, my friend's sister, I'll call her J, started doing karaoke and I joined in. The guys decided they wanted to go to the skate park and fuck around. They asked if I wanted to go and J said, "No, Alice is gonna stay here with me and the other girls singing karaoke." J actually included me in the girl stuff, it was awesome! I've always had a lot of female friends but it was the first time I actually felt like a group of girls was accepting and including me. The party kinda split up into male and female groups and I was included in the female group without it even being a question.
The rest of the night was great, I had a good time, we played a bunch of random challenge games, and I got pretty drunk. Slept on the couch.
I almost didn't go because I was so self conscious about being visibly trans and having to introduce myself to people. I'm so glad I went anyway. it gave me a lot more confidence. Even though I know I don't pass it's amazing to finally just be myself.
I hope you all have similar positive experiences in the future! ❤️