Saying no to a date?
Not sure if this is a good place to post but I need advice
I (24F) female started going to a personal trainer about 2 months ago. It’s a relatively small local gym with like 3ish trainers and the building itself is pretty small, probably the size of a living room in someone’s house.
Everyone there is really nice and likes to chat with another. Because of the size it’s easy to do this because we’re not really spread out.
There’s a guy there a few years younger than me. I was going twice a week around the same time so we’d see each other there. He’s nice but not my type.
He friendly tho and I don’t mind exchanging some convo but im not interested in being more than friends. For additional info, he talks pretty loudly and I think he may be neurodivergent to some extent tbh, just a vibe I get from him. I feel like he’s not the best at social cues?
Anyway, we’ve talked a few times during the workouts because it’s a pretty open space.
A few weeks ago around both our birthdays he invited me to join his friends at a bar. I ended up not going bc of other plans. The next time I saw him I mention to him that a restaurant/bar in town does free drinks if it’s your birthday. I think he thought I was inviting him out to get drinks together but I was just telling him
Since then he has asked for my number and said we should do something . The first time it caught me off guard because I was in the middle of using a machine and he asked pretty loudly to which everyone could hear. I told him I was busy that weekend but yeah we’ll have to.
At my next session my trainer pulled me to the side and asked how I felt as she didn’t want me to feel uncomfortable going there. I basically just told her I saw him as just a friend and I wouldn’t mind maybe hanging out casually but I don’t want to give him the wrong idea. Again this makes it awkward bc it’s a small space so everyone heard our interaction.
The next week he again asked while I was on my way out for my number. I just gave it to him. He later texted and invited me for drinks with his friends but I had plans already. He texted me this weekend and asked what I was up to but I never responded.
He just texted me today and said he wanted to follow up if I wanted to hang this week.
I’m sure he’s a nice guy and i don’t mind being friends but I don’t want him to get the wrong idea. Also, I am busy and have never like intentionally not hung out with him, I work full time and have other friends and things going on.
Anyway, I don’t want to be mean or make it awkward. I only go to this PT once a week now anyway so I don’t see him as often anyway I guess, but hanging out isn’t a priority as much when I also have other things going on. I’m sure he’s nice but idk what to do.
I could just hangout w him and make sure to communicate we’re friends, that’s all he might want anyway, to make more friends. Idk. I’m not trying to be superficial or even egotistical to think this is a date or something, it could just be a guy trying to make friends.