u/Akvira_6266

TW : Rant so long post ahead

So y'all know bout the Madonna Whore Complex? It's a dichotomy of situations women are compelled to be in as long as it appeases the society. So it puts women in a juxtaposition basically where women are either Madonna (virgin) or a Whore (slut) , no in between. A black/white situation basically.

(Google definition - The Madonna-whore complex is a psychological phenomenon where men divide women into two categories: saintly "Madonnas" (pure, nurturing, unsexual) or degraded "whores" (promiscuous, sexualized) ).

I recently had the misfortune to be the victim of it. We had our college cultural fest a while ago where you can wear traditional dress on the last day. So it's an unspoken rule for girls to be in a saree and since it was my first year i followed it vehemently. I put on my best saree, a black Georgette sleeveless one, with a deep neck blouse. I was looking gorgeous and was getting many compliments.

One of my very good friends who considers herself holier than thou wore a simple red/black saree of her mother and looked beautiful no denying that. She's that pious, prudey typa girl who'd degrade any promiscuity upon confrontation. I have no problem with her existence i just let her be but she somehow has to make every matter a two faced coin in which she'd be on the good side just because she doesn't curse she's not into dating and stuff doesn't think of any nsfw etc etc ykwim.

Again, I'm a feminist and i support her with all my might okay.

So back to the incident, one other friend of ours came up to compliment us and said that both of us looked beautiful no difference. Then she turned to me and said “aap to bahut hot lag rhi hai aapko dekhke bahut ladke mar jayenge” in a flirty tone and i reciprocated the same. So next my very holier than thou friend said “yes isko dekhke ladke mar jayenge aur mujhe dekhke ladke rishta leke aayenge. Isko girlfriend banayenge aur mujhe wife” . That made me gasp. What she implied is her dressing and behaviour is going to catch the eyes of guys needing a ‘sarvaguna sampann sati savitri pativrata stree’ and my dress that's too revealing by her connotation will make me a part of just male lust and not male love. The sheer audacity of vilifying another woman to an objectified stance is utterly disgusting. I just nodded because firstly i didn't wanna waste my exciting day on this imbecile and secondly arguing of morality with such an idiot is the last thing I'd prefer. So i didn't say anything and it didn't even hit me until recently that she'd just classified me as a whore.

What's more mind boggling is that she calls herself a feminist, one that flights for the rights of women in a male-centric world. Excuse me ma'am that doesn't quite appear to me as feminism! Or maybe I'm just looking at the wrong definition. Such girls/women in our field are referred to as choice feminists and what ideology they exhibit is choice feminism. I bet she isn't even aware of this term because quite obviously!

Again no offence to her or her dress she looked beautiful i complimented her a lot but that mindset was what made me despise her. I could've confronted her then and there but it wasn't much in my mental favor to do so.

So yeah that was the Madonna Whore Complex in action. Quite an appalling thing to witness tbh.

TW : Rant so long post ahead

So y'all know bout the Madonna Whore Complex? It's a dichotomy of situations women are compelled to be in as long as it appeases the society. So it puts women in a juxtaposition basically where women are either Madonna (virgin) or a Whore (slut) , no in between. A black/white situation basically.

(Google definition - The Madonna-whore complex is a psychological phenomenon where men divide women into two categories: saintly "Madonnas" (pure, nurturing, unsexual) or degraded "whores" (promiscuous, sexualized) ).

I recently had the misfortune to be the victim of it. We had our college cultural fest a while ago where you can wear traditional dress on the last day. So it's an unspoken rule for girls to be in a saree and since it was my first year i followed it vehemently. I put on my best saree, a black Georgette sleeveless one, with a deep neck blouse. I was looking gorgeous and was getting many compliments.

One of my very good friends who considers herself holier than thou wore a simple red/black saree of her mother and looked beautiful no denying that. She's that pious, prudey typa girl who'd degrade any promiscuity upon confrontation. I have no problem with her existence i just let her be but she somehow has to make every matter a two faced coin in which she'd be on the good side just because she doesn't curse she's not into dating and stuff doesn't think of any nsfw etc etc ykwim.

Again, I'm a feminist and i support her with all my might okay.

So back to the incident, one other friend of ours came up to compliment us and said that both of us looked beautiful no difference. Then she turned to me and said “aap to bahut hot lag rhi hai aapko dekhke bahut ladke mar jayenge” in a flirty tone and i reciprocated the same. So next my very holier than thou friend said “yes isko dekhke ladke mar jayenge aur mujhe dekhke ladke rishta leke aayenge. Isko girlfriend banayenge aur mujhe wife” . That made me gasp. What she implied is her dressing and behaviour is going to catch the eyes of guys needing a ‘sarvaguna sampann sati savitri pativrata stree’ and my dress that's too revealing by her connotation will make me a part of just male lust and not male love. The sheer audacity of vilifying another woman to an objectified stance is utterly disgusting. I just nodded because firstly i didn't wanna waste my exciting day on this imbecile and secondly arguing of morality with such an idiot is the last thing I'd prefer. So i didn't say anything and it didn't even hit me until recently that she'd just classified me as a whore.

What's more mind boggling is that she calls herself a feminist, one that flights for the rights of women in a male-centric world. Excuse me ma'am that doesn't quite appear to me as feminism! Or maybe I'm just looking at the wrong definition. Such girls/women in our field are referred to as choice feminists and what ideology they exhibit is choice feminism. I bet she isn't even aware of this term because quite obviously!

Again no offence to her or her dress she looked beautiful i complimented her a lot but that mindset was what made me despise her. I could've confronted her then and there but it wasn't much in my mental favor to do so.

So yeah that was the Madonna Whore Complex in action. Quite an appalling thing to witness tbh.