u/AgentGrouchy682

My son is 1 in 1 week. DWT 0645, Nap #1 10, Nap #2 3, Bedtime 8p. Naps capped 2 hours : Nap 1 I have to cap at 1.5 hours, nap 2 does not and has never linked/been longer than 1 sleep cycle.

Problems pre sleep training: First nap required a rescue, false start each night, multiple MOTN wakes that ended in me bedsharing to sleep. Last night was night 4. Last feed ends 1930 -> bath, lotion/diaper/jammies -> stories until bedtime. Down awake in own room with blackout curtains and sound machine on white noise.

We elected for full extinction this time and I honestly wish I did it earlier. We are having really good progress so far. His first nap is linking and MOTN wakes are decreasing or non-existent. His False start however is still lingering and lasts a while. He has had one most of his life no matter what schedule I had him on, but as we approach the 1 year mark I would love to stamp it out. Notes if they help -
Night 1: Bedtime - 18m crying. False start - 25m crying followed by 25m cycling between whining/calling out and quiet. 2am Wakeup - offered a feed. Fell asleep and placed back in crib. Woke up upon transfer & cried 20m. 4:10 wake up, cried 24m. Then slept until DWT.

Night 2: Only protest at bedtime. False start - 40m crying. 3am MOTN wake - offered a feed and fell asleep during it. Placed back in crib. Woke up upon transfer and cried 6m.

Night 3: **Notes for this day: 3 hours of daytime sleep due to a babysitter misunderstanding my 2 hours of nap request AND cut a tooth this night into night 4 - found it the next morning brushing his teeth. Sorry dude*. Only protest at bedtime again. False start - 2m crying. 20m fussing. Woke up again 10m later and proceeded to cycle between whining and quiet for a full hour. I thought it was an extinction burst at the time. He then STTN until an EMW 5:45 - Whined on and off until DWT.

Night 4: Motrin before bedtime for presumed lingering teething discomfort. Bedtime only protest again - quiet before I finished closing the door. False start - cycled between quiet and whining / small cries for 50m once again. Woke 1:30 - offered a feed. No protest when placed down. Slept until DWT.

Sanity check me. Does he need a schedule adjustment, just more time? It is VERY habitual so I am not eager to drop a nap [he is quite ready for his naps when they are due] or make a drastic change but I also do not want to torture him. I also feel bad he is getting a tooth during this but I feel like stopping would be more confusing, and he is catching on fairly well. My ultimate goal is to cut night feeds but I am working on 1 think at a time. I am pretty confident hell just drop them himself as he gets more proficient at independent sleep. I only offer 1 feed by going in immediately for the first wake after midnight and if he falls asleep the feed is over. He doesnt take a pacifier, I did introduce a lovey but hes pretty indifferent toward it.

Husband and I are “full sending” (Extinction) our 11.5m tonight. Schedule is 3.5/4/4.5. 1 nap transition is probably not far away but he’s not ready right now. His first WW maxes at like 4 hours then he’s falling asleep sitting up. We have to rescue his longer morning nap and wakes up between each sleep cycle overnight. Bed-sharing used to be a sweet thing we all enjoyed but now it’s survival/a necessity and no longer fun. We are ready to have our evenings and naps back, but very apprehensive about how this will go.

Previous methods with more soothing/parent involvement have failed. We have spent the last 4-5 weeks upping from SWAPS, to SLS, and now have had 2 Ferber attempts now where he eventually vomits from crying. We just spent a week mentally preparing for a yet another attempt. Here goes nothing. Tell me your success stories! Priority to people to were in similar shoes as us : older babies who had to cold turkey the big bed/breastfeeding to bridge sleep cycles to manifest independent sleep utilizing CIO.

If this doesn’t work, I will seriously pursue getting him evaluated for a medical issue or hiring a long term sleep consultant (one you work with for multiple weeks) if anyone has a recommendation.

My husband and I are at a loss for what to do with our son. Bedsharing currently. It actually worked really well for us for a while but now he cannot connect sleep cycles on his own at all. His first nap needs a rescue and he has a false start each night. This is our third serious attempt to sleep train him, and its going very poorly. We have a by the clock schedule with 12 hours of awake time.

DWT 6:30,Nap 1 at 10am (rescued to be about 60-75m). Nap 2 at 3 (we let this one be whatever it is= typically 1 sleep cycle: +/-35m). Bedtime locked in at 8p.

Recently, even putting him down fully asleep only works for 20m or so, he is too aware of his surroundings. I deleted my notes but the last time we bucked down to train him (using ferber) we had the something similar to the following:

Night 1: First attempted SLS/chair method because it resonated with me. He cried for 50m with no signs of downshifting. I switched methods to ferber, he fell asleep before the 2nd pop in.

Night 2: Fell asleep on his on within 10 minutes/only 1 pop in and the False start required no pop ins. Some extended whining in the MOTN, did not escalate to full crying.

Night 3: Fell asleep on his own / no crying. No false start. He only woke up once, I do not remember exactly what time. I did nurse him for a few minutes because it was an appropriate time to do so and put him back down. He then slept until 5ish, and put himself back to sleep until DWT. Also note his first nap linked by itself.

Night 4: No false start. Extended crying x2 in the MOTN. Nap linked again.

Night 5: False start returned, lasted for 40m. Went to him for 2nd pop in and found he had vomited. ST attempt terminated. Nap linked, and continued to do so for about 3 weeks.

The fact that he has a false start AND his nap needs rescuing is what is prompting us to re-re-retrain him. I also have 2 weekend trips coming up this summer and I want to set my boys up for success.

I realize this suggests his sleep needs changed as sleep consolidated but I have already pushed his wake windows to 12 hours/ approx 3.5/4/4.5. He is quite tired by the time we get to a nap or bedtime but he does not self settle anymore at all. He just escalates similar to what we had night 5, and has vomited another time since then when we try to push through. I even brought him to his pedi to rule out an ear infection etc. We pick him up and he is out within a minute or two.

Any advice appreciated.

Anyone here sleep train at 12 months? How did it go and what method did you use.

11.5 months right now but 3.5/3.5/4.5.

Sleep trained at one point Ferber but not anymore. Naps are crap / need rescuing and he has a false start. I place him down awake in his crib and set a timer he just screams. I know I need to push through it but last time I tried he cried until he threw up.

I don’t think he is ready for 1 nap as he is usually quite tired for his first nap, he just can’t link sleep cycles independently.

Currently bed sharing and I actually love the snuggles but I have 2 weekend trips this summer and I don’t want to set him up for failure . Also, I want my naps and early evenings back .

11.5 months, Currently bedsharing (which we have done off & on most of his life). Truthfully, my husband and I have grown to really enjoy the snuggles & convenience.

DWT 6:30, Nap 1 10 (60-75m), Nap 2 3 (35m), Bed 8p.

Bedtime routine is milks/bath/Diaper + Lotion + Jammies/Story.

Previously sleep trained ferber x2. We both had covid AND had work being done to our house so we ended up bedsharing again about a month ago. For a minute it was a nice balance where he would crib nap during the day & start of the night then snuggles later. I am trying to change it now because he is now having false starts and his longer nap consistently needs rescuing. I am suspicious because of his age he expects the same sleep conditions during the day that he gets at night.

I can put him down in his crib *fully* awake and he will put himself to sleep, perhaps with some protesting first. My problem is he false starts, and can go on for quite a while, 30m+. The false start robs him of enough sleep pressure so that going back to bed is hard/it gives him enough of a second wind to protest crib sleeping and ask for the big bed. when he finally does fall asleep, he is up again 45ish m later (next sleep cycle) and it repeats. Most recent sleep training attempt he cried until he threw up, and my husband and I did not have the resolve to continue. That was about a week ago.

I am wondering if he is actually on the verge of 1 nap, and how much that will complicate retraining him. He is sometimes fighting that second nap, even with a 4 hour wake window and only 1 hour nap to start the day.

I do not even necessarily need him to STTN, I just want my naps and evenings back. Any advice appreciated.