I have an almost two year old daughter who has been in daycare since she was very little due to my husband's and my demanding work schedule. She honestly loved it and seemed to thrive there. We just had our second child a few weeks ago, and due to the fact that the price of a nanny for two more is similar to the price of daycare for two, and because we felt like we may need more support at home with things like kids' laundry, meal prep, washing bottles, etc with two kids, we decided to switch over to a nanny. Today is her first day - I am still on maternity leave for a few more weeks - and I am having serious regret about our decision. I know our nanny can't be expected to know exactly what my two year old wants and needs right away, and it takes time, but right now my two year old doesn't feel comfortable with her yet, only wants me, is really sensitive and melting down a lot, the newborn still needs me to nurse constantly, so I feel like I'm doing everything for both kids today, all while worrying about the impression my kid is making on my nanny (are her meltdowns scaring her away? Is a newborn and a two year old too much for her?) and whether I've made the right call for my kid (is this the right person to watch her? is it too much change too close to her sister being born? Does she miss the structure and socialization of daycare?). Meanwhile I'll be working from home more this upcoming year and I'm having serious cold feet about the fact that now both kids and a nanny will be in the home with me while I try to get work done. Idk if it's the postpartum hormones too but I'm truly spiraling and panicking with regret. I don't even know if I could get back the daycare spot that I gave up, but do I need to just chill and give the transition more time? If I tell the nanny it's not working and try to go back to daycare am I the worst person in the world? I would have to probably guarantee her some pay/severance, right? Please help a spiraling new mom of two.
u/AfterAd2756
I have an almost two year old daughter who has been in daycare since she was very little due to my husband's and my demanding work schedule. She honestly loved it and seemed to thrive there. We just had our second child a few weeks ago, and due to the fact that the price of a nanny for two more is similar to the price of daycare for two, and because we felt like we may need more support at home with things like kids' laundry, meal prep, washing bottles, etc with two kids, we decided to switch over to a nanny. Today is her first day - I am still on maternity leave for a few more weeks - and I am having serious regret about our decision. I know our nanny can't be expected to know exactly what my two year old wants and needs right away, and it takes time, but right now my two year old doesn't feel comfortable with her yet, only wants me, is really sensitive and melting down a lot, the newborn still needs me to nurse constantly, so I feel like I'm doing everything for both kids today, all while worrying about the impression my kid is making on my nanny (are her meltdowns scaring her away? Is a newborn and a two year old too much for her?) and whether I've made the right call for my kid (is this the right person to watch her? is it too much change too close to her sister being born? Does she miss the structure and socialization of daycare?). Meanwhile I'll be working from home more this upcoming year and I'm having serious cold feet about the fact that now both kids and a nanny will be in the home with me while I try to get work done. Idk if it's the postpartum hormones too but I'm truly spiraling and panicking with regret. I don't even know if I could get back the daycare spot that I gave up, but do I need to just chill and give the transition more time? If I tell the nanny it's not working and try to go back to daycare am I the worst person in the world? I would have to probably guarantee her some pay/severance, right? Please help a spiraling new mom of two.