What should I do?
Forewarning: sorry if this is hard to read I’m not really good about talking about how I feel.
I, 23f have been with my fiancé, 27m, for about three and a half years and have been living together for I think three. Our living situation is definitely unorthodox as we live with his parents and his younger sister who is 10 and we pay $700 in rent to them and we still help around the house with chores. Recently I have just finished cancer treatment and he stuck with me through all of it and drove me to appointments but didn’t really with the household stuff until I had a breakdown and then he only helped for a few weeks. Back in Feb/March I stayed in NYC for six weeks with my mom receiving harsh treatment for the cancer and it was the most free that I had felt in a long time and felt the most like myself than I had even before the cancer. My fiancé and I used to work for the same company but in different positions and he made roughly $45/hr where I make $27/hr he left the company a year ago and started a job where he makes half of what he used to and now he has no health benefits or anything and made me the breadwinner. I brought up us moving to NYC together as we have a few years before we can have kids he shut down that idea entirely. Most of me can see myself having a future with this man because I do love him and he makes me laugh and most of the time feel happy and I’ve never been in love with anyone else the way I love him but a part of me is wondering if staying is the right choice or leave even though it would hurt. I’ve talked to him about getting a different high paying job but he refuses to and he talks about moving out of his parent but I don’t know if that’s actually something he wants. Oh and I just remembered before posting we have a week long vacation planned with his family in August and a weekend trip to the finger lakes in November also with his family but we never do anything with mine.