I'm so done. I want to give up on this class.
I'm so sick of this class. It's too late to drop it but it's not too late to stop letting it eat at my time and efforts.
I wish it didn't have such a bad connotation to talk about "giving up" on it compared to if i had mentioned withdrawing a few weeks sooner. I genuinely think it's worth considering now if there is still a plausible world where I pass it. Nobody's willing to entertain the hypothetical but I seriously think it should be asked.
I want to say that all semester I've felt behind in it, but I can't even say that because it has so few grades, nothing to practice and get direct feedback with, and no form of clear structure or online reference materials relating back to the lectures. I've never had anything to clearly take notes on. I've tried to just self-teach it with other resources but there's never any study guides to make sure what I learn matches what I need to use for the graded parts.
I've been looking into it. Literally anywhere else, and this class is a low-level breeze. An easy online gimme course. I'm furious with myself and with everything. It's genuinely starting to hurt my mental state when I think about it too much. It could have been so easy and quick, and instead this is where I'm stuck, and all for a class barely related to my major, with nothing before it and nothing following.
I want to give up on doing it here. I'm sure the professor is doing their best and it works for others, but literally any and every sort of structure I've ever succeeded through in other classes is absent here. I'm so done. I just cannot believe it's worth the effort to catch up at this point when half of that effort is a giant guessing game anymore, even when I try to ask about it. It makes me sad and angry all the time.
I want to give up on it. Take a C- or D or whatever middling "fail" grade, and just take it online over the summer, now with everything that it was lacking here.
I know it sounds bad on paper but I honestly see less and less reason I shouldn't now, but no one in my life wants me to go down that path without a fight. I'm so sick of fighting for this random graduation prereq.
I guess it sounds like my mind is already made up, but honestly I'm typing this because I still am not sure if it's right. There's only two grades left to save the class, barring any miracle bonus points. I need a C (and guess what, it's a plus minus class, so that's actually a 72), and to make that I'd need probably higher grades on the last two assignments than I've almost ever gotten on the rest of the course's analogous assignments before. Even when I really did try.
I guess I can try harder but how much can I do I wasn't doing already? And I don't have infinite time here. I mean how long till it takes a toll on my other classes? One of those two last assignments (this week.) is the same day as TWO other classes' exams. Three things on one day. Who do I prioritize now?
I'm having a hard time evaluating my real grade because the canvas isn't accurate. I'm having a hard time evaluating if the professor would honestly give me bonus pts now. I can't even figure the situation out properly let alone figure out what to do with it.
I'm so tired man. At what point do you stop and figure out how to figure out if it's still worth it.
And yes I've emailed my advisors. But I guess I was too polite to say to them what I am saying here. Do they answer honestly when you ask them if a class is legitimately a lost cause, even if it's not in the most literal mathematical sense? Who looks at a university employee and asks them "do I stop trying?"