How did you navigate estate planning with step siblings in mind (Texas)
i’m not sure if this should go in another subreddit considering the moral or philosophical complexities to my inquiry. Please excuse me if this should go somewhere else
My father and mother have been discussing estate planning with me now that they are in their late 60’s. I have a step brother from my fathers side whose been a part my life for as long as I can remember. I moved with my parents to another texas at 9 and have lived here ever since (in my mid 30’s now).
My step brother never lived in our house and only came down to visit from Ohio occasionally over the last two decades. Holidays things like that. When finished college and had to decide where to live, he decided to stay in the midwest.
My father wants to place our home in a trust and split it between my brother and I. This has caused some discussion in my immediate family about if that’s “fair”.
It’s a complicated situation for me because I love my brother very much and I don’t want to cut him out of anything. My mother wants to give him something else and leave the house to me. Her position is that my step brother isn’t her blood and while she loves him, she feels i should be responsible for deciding what happens to the home she raised me in.
My father, i imagine, feels guilty that the house is the most financially lucrative asset he owns and the idea of not giving my step brother some of it would feel wrong.
I’m in the middle. I don’t really have a problem splitting things with my brother but I don’t know what our relationship is going to be like when my old man passes. I don’t want any ugliness or issues to come up because of money.
there is also a part of me that feels that this house is my childhood home. I grew up here, went to all the public schools in the neighborhood, took my prom pictures in the front yard, have all my memories here. My step brother’s life is back in the midwest and i wouldn’t dare feel entitled to anything his mother is giving him. Should something happen to my parents, I feel that it should be my choice and responsibility to decide what happens to our home. If we decide to sell the house or split assets, i feel like it should be my choice to decide what happens with them.
This could just be greed and selfishness…idk
I also feel I shouldn’t be involved in this process as it’s their assets, but they want me to be in the loop. it’s very stressful
have any of you had to deal with this? What did you do?