How can I overcome the accumulated psychological traumas I have experienced?
In my final year of university, I lost 90% of my sight due to a botched surgery. Despite immense effort, I managed to graduate with a master's degree. This came after a long struggle with poverty and family breakdown, as my father abandoned his responsibilities, remarried, and left my mother, siblings, and me to suffer in poverty and hardship in a dilapidated dwelling. Later, an opportunity arose for me to travel to Belgium with the support of one of my brothers. However, I was devastated to discover that there was no medical treatment possible for my condition. I tried to adapt and contacted associations for the visually impaired in Brussels. But I encountered only indifference and contempt simply because I lacked a residency permit. One association, located near the main train station, was so disheartening that I wished I had never contacted them. You cannot imagine the humiliation I endured from them—the lies, the hypocrisy, the contempt.
Another association asked me to pay subscription fees for their recreational services at a time when I was seeking integration into society and trying to adapt to my difficult life as a visually impaired person without a residence permit and socially ostracized.
Sometimes, whenever I remember my suffering, I cry uncontrollably, wishing I were dead. I always looked for places where I could sit alone, far from the insults and suffering, far away where no one could see me broken and crying.