u/Accomplished-Pie7263

I had PGAD start to mildly develop in my second pregnancy ( I have had all c-sections).

Then it started raging in my 3rd pregnancy in the third trimester especially. It got to the point I couldn't orgasm alone- I needed my husband for nipple stimulation.

The day before my c-section I couldnt climax on my second orgasm even though I tried all day and got really close.

Now 10 days postpartum I can't orgasm at all. I've tried everyday since day 2 postpartum.

I am so anxious and scared I'm throwing up bc I have no release but all the sensation when I try. I never anticipated this could happen. I thought the end of my pregnancy meant the resolution of the worst symptoms.

My c-section pain is nearly gone, I'm not breastfeeding etc.

I have the best husband in the world and my kids are so precious to me. I feel like I have this beautiful life and then this happens and makes me spiral to a very dark place. I can't sleep without an anxiety pill, I wake up with panic attacks, and my husband and also my Dad are mostly helping with the kids. I have never had postpartum depression, this is 100% situational.

If this happened to anyone after kids it would be so helpful to not feel so alone. The sensation is still all there, I just can't climax now and its driving me crazy. Do you think this is permanent or maybe hormone driven ?? It didnt happen in my last pregnancies but I'm 40 now.

I developed severe pgad in my third trimester, previously I was hypersensitive but this is like nothing I have experienced. I was on a cycle where if I had 5 to 7 orgasms one day the next day I wouldn't feel the need for any. It's like neurologically I reset which helped me rest. As my pregnancy progressed it took longer to have the orgasms and I eventually couldn't do it on my own so I tried to move to just a couple per night and it backfired and I have it constantly now.

Here are the worst parts.

1. Toys and solo masterbation no longer work. I can only do it with the help of my husband/ nipple stimulation and clitoral stimulation. There is so much pressure in my pelvis from my baby it is taking longer and longer. I frequently take breaks and cry while trying it's becoming so distressing.
2. I have polyhydramnios which is high amniotic fluid so I can already not breathe. Plus the pelvic girdle pain and pressure. I can only masterbate on my back a tiny bit elevated. No other positions work- I can't get relaxed enough to orgasm. Takes 20-40 minutes each with my husband. A few times in high distress over an hour. He is a saint who has stood by me through it all.
3. I have an almost 3 year old who routinely has to go in his room and be watched on the monitor. We have to distract him multiple times a day with shows to dedicate time to these orgasms I need for relief and sanity. I feel so sad I'm not a better Mom right now. I developed pgad at the very end of my last pregnancy but it really lessened after. It was not hard to achieve orgasms like it is now.
4. My OBGYN doesn't care. She won't deliver the baby a week or two early even though he is term. She won't look i to meds or treatments, they literally do nothing for me. They admitted me to the hospital and gave me ambien for a night.

My mental health is in a spiral. I have never had postpartum depression or this level of anxiety but I am getting blood pressure spikes and calling mental health hotlines. I can't risk being labeled as crazy and be separated from my husband bc he is the only way I can find relief.

I'm in so much arousal, distress and pain. I don't know how to make it through the next 9 days until my c section. I'm so scared I'm going to lose my mind from physical exhaustion, arousal, and insomnia. I have a prescription from my family medicine doctor for Ativan...its not recommended in pregnancy but the OBGYN will find no other ways for me to cope so it's my only option as of this week...and now I am scared my baby will be born dependent on benzos. They don't weigh the well-being of the mother or factor me into any decision-making. Of course I want my baby to be healthy and protected but is it good for him to be absorbing all this stress, high heart rate, insomnia, and temporary bp spikes? I feel like mh survival depends on the small dose of ativan I need to cope.

Sorry just needed to vent. I am so so so stressed. This is the hardest time of my life. I feel so traumatized by this and can't believe there is nothing this obgyn practice will do to ease my suffering. Third and very wanted pregnancy too. Would never go through with another ... I feel so trapped in an uncomfortable body I just want to escape. I was such a happy person before this hit.

Thank you for listening if you read this far.

Update: right after I posted this I got approved for a 38 week c-section...so 2 days from now. Thank you guys so much for the support. At least the owner of my OBGYN practice takes this disorder seriously. I am so shocked how dismissive everyone else was.