stupid school
i tried out for my schools colorguard team last year and didn't make it, however they told me that i can stay on the team but be an alternate ( like if somone isn't there i fill in which they never let me do btw) and i would be on the team next year. I stayed on as an alternate all year and even paid all the dues everyone else did wich was a lot of money considering i wasn't even gonna be on the. feild. I then tried out and literally everyone made it on the team besides me and a few other people for callbacks. But what makes me so pissed is that our coaches let people on the team who are new to it and literally just started learning everything over me who literally had been with them for the year.
Some of them are good at dance but suck at the flag work and it makes me so mad. I feel like because i'm not best friends with the coach that's why i'm not getting in. She was so strict on the fact that we had to be at every event last year, however this year she's telling all of her favorites that it dosent matter if they can't make it and that she'll figure something out. And that makes me so frustrated because how can you say that when you would get so insanely mad at us last year??!?! I feel like i've let my parents down too because i have to do callbacks i also feel so embarrassed about not making it
I’ve just been feeling really down about this and i’ve been beating myself up about it.