Husband doesn’t seem attracted to me
I’m 8 months pregnant, and my husband and I haven’t had sex since I became pregnant. Before the pregnancy we had a great sex life. The other day we were talking and I shared with him that I was feeling insecure about my body. He asked why and we discussed it. He basically admitted that he was no longer attracted to me. He didn’t exactly say those words, but that’s what it boiled down to. I was upset by this and he said that after the pregnancy I would go back to normal and things between us would go back to normal too. Later I brought it up again that I was disturbed by what he said, and he reiterated that after the pregnancy things would be different and told me to “get a grip”.
Since then, I’ve been crying on and off. I feel alone and resentful of him. How easy for him not to experience any of the physical toll of pregnancy and just decide that he doesn’t want me anymore at the time that I’m most vulnerable. The funny thing is that the sex is not even an issue for me, it’s not the most important aspect of our relationship for me. What bothers me is that I don’t feel supported.
This is a wanted baby for both of us, and I’ve only gained the healthy amount of weight for the pregnancy. I work out regularly (even though it’s been hard), eat well, still try to dress pretty. All of which is irrelevant because I feel his attitude would be unacceptable even if I didn’t do those things.
I worry that his postpartum expectations are unrealistic. I will be recovering from birth, perhaps have scars and so on. My looks will hardly get better from here. Not to mention that I don’t think I will see him the same way anymore after his behaviour during my time of vulnerability.
Has anyone else had a similar experience? I don’t know how to resolve this conflict.