Hi! I ( F29) have been nannying for the same family five years this July. I watch 4 children 10 and under. 2nd eldest NK has first communion this weekend, and the thing is, this weekend is also my birthday. My first birthday off of work since I’ve been nannying. Originally NM had asked me a month or two ago if my husband and I were coming to make it to the party, I had said something along the lines of “ It’s definitely possible but I don’t know if my husband has anything planned for me as a birthday surprise.
Flash forward to yesterday NM ids asking me for opinions of what outfit to order for NK and then asks again if I will be coming to the party. I tell her basically “ It seems like my husband might have a surprise planned, I’ve gotten some accidental hints, so I’m uncertain that I’ll be there”
“ well the party isn’t ON your birthday, so you could still come”
I kind of say something to pacify her and continue in with my day. Do I suck? Keep in mind this is the family where both adults take off of work and make a big deal out of birthdays. NK has not asked me once if I’ll be there, also does an 8 year old really care if I’m there for his after party with all of his friends? It’s also a 35 minute drive each way just to pop in and say hi and then be ignored.
I’ve been to every birthday party I’ve been invited to, I’ve only ever missed one baptism party, but that was due to me being not even in the state on the day of the party.
I’m feeling really pressured to go. The other thing is, next weekend I leave for a week long ATV trip with my family. There’s a literal laundry list of things I need to get done and Sunday is my last non-work day to prepare. Am I an awful person if I don’t go, or is my social anxiety just making me feel that way?