I of course have never been able to burp (duh)...except for one time. I was in Huntington Beach, CA like 12 years ago with my family. We went to BJ's (the restaurant, not the premium service) and this is where the Sonic Burp was unintentionally constructed. (Disclaimer, I'm skinny and have a small stomach).
We ate some chips and salsa as an appetizer. I filled up a good amount on that while chugging my Dr. Pepper. Then, my personal-sized pizza arrived at the table. Greasy, but so darn yummy. I ate all of it. While eating it, the waitress refilled my now-empty Dr. Pepper, as well as my heart. I thought "okay, I'll have to stop at 2 Dr. Peppers." I finished the 2nd soda just a little before my family was finished eating. Then...the unexpected happened...the waitress brought me a 3rd soda.
Not only do I have RCPD...but I also have OCD (I love acronyms apparently). Part of my OCD is I absolutely HATE wasting food or drinks. So, even though I was very full and had already had 2 glasses of Dr. Pepper, which can be rough with RCPD...I had unfinished business to tend to. I forced myself to start drinking it. I got maybe 40% of the way and just did not have much left in me, so I paused...then, my family was ready to leave. Didn't want to waste it, so I chugged the rest of it.
As we're walking out, I'm feeling so full and so bloated. We walk just a little bit towards the beach in that sort of Downtown Huntington Beach area until we get to Jamba Juice (which sadly isn't there anymore). My sister wanted a smoothie. She asked me if I wanted a smoothie and I said "no thanks, I'm allergic to eggs." With a confused look, she turned and went in to place her order.
I'm standing outside and I am absolutely not feeling well. My stomach was so bloated and felt like it was going to explode. Finally, after a few minutes of them blending up her strawberries and blueberries and cranberries and blackberries and chuckberries while she tries to remember the pin to her debit card, I suddenly felt like I was going to throw up.
I go hurrying into the Jamba Juice. It smelled like smoothies, it looked like smoothies, and it sounded like the making of smoothies, mixed with someone saying "I'll be with you in just a moment" as I went hurrying by. I then made a terrifying and devastating discovery...they didn't have a bathroom in there. I went hurrying back out and left the patrons to sip on their smoothies.
I looked around frantically hoping to figure out if a nearby place had a bathroom, but I finally couldn't hold it in any longer. I ran over to the nearest trash can and my body did the whole action of throwing up...but the only thing that came out was air, and it didn't sound like throwing up. I finally had my first burp. This was my body's drastic measures to get a burp out (glad I'm able to fart)...but it was no ordinary burp. It was the loudest sound any human could produce, amplified by that trash can being aluminum or metal...and empty, except for a Starbucks cup and a flyer for $2 Banana Splits at a nearby karaoke bar's 17th Grand Opening of the year. This was the birth of the Sonic Burp.
My mom saw it all play out from about 20 feet away. The burp was so loud that a lady who was walking by jumped and looked over at me like she just saw an alien trying to twerk. My mom laughed so hard that she almost peed herself. I wish I could've seen the reactions.
As soon as that happened, I suddenly felt perfectly fine. My sister came out with her Verry Berry Jerry smoothie and asked what that sound was. It was then that she found out that her little brother, who had never burped in his entire life...just produced the loudest burp known to man. My family was so proud of me.
They carried me on their shoulders as we went off into the sunset (it was actually only like noon) and enjoyed some time on the beach. I was a changed man...and I didn't have any more soda that day.
I added a little bit of silliness to my story since it was such a ridiculous thing to happen lmao. However, this is a true story and it was outrageously loud. I haven't burped since then though and my RCPD has been horrible for years. Now that I know what it is, I'll get something done this year.
I've attached a picture of the legendary trash can where this otherworldly event took place, with Jamba Juice in the background. As you can see in this picture, lots of people now travel from all around the world to get to spend time at the site of this iconic moment. They stand there in the same spot that I released the Sonic Burp. As you can see, they are amazed by it...and the Google Street View Car driving by. You can also see that I have some emails I need to open once I finish this mini documentary.
I'll wrap this up with this: I want you to know that my Sonic Burp just shows that you can achieve the unachievable if you simply just set your mind to it...or if you consume 3 sodas, a personal pizza, and some nachos while only weighing like 135 pounds at 5' 10". Live long and prosburp. 🖖🏼🥱