24 hours in
Holy guck fuck me what the fuck how am i supposed to get through this.
I decided to take desmoxan on my trip back home to pakistan because the last time i took it i realized it made my vape start hitting less so i stopped taking desmoxan so i could keep getting satisfaction from my vape . Im going to be home for a week and the plan is to finally get off it.
I realized i needed a change of scenery. So now i am 24 hours in, at my layover airport, and drunk standing on the smoking terrace trying to bum a cigarette off somebody.
A few things i have learned:
I left my vape at home by accident, otherwise, i dont think i would have gone through with this plan. If i make it atlease another day im gonna ask a friend to go to my apartment and get rid of all my vapes
The cravings actually do go away, they hit hard, like super super hard, but after a while it does die down which gives me hope in the sense that i wont feel like this all the time
Alcohol is a bad idea, i keep getting more drinks to kinda offset the cravings but obviously it just leads to more cravings and this feeling of “wow holy shit a vape would feel so soo good right now”
I really want someone to tell me its not this…painful after a while. Like i feel i have a very limited amount of willpower and i have used almost all of it up during the past few cravings. I dont know if i can fight it like this for the rest of my life…