well, this all starts off on christmas eve 2025...
i played online slots and then... I won huge.
this was the worst mistake of my life and i wish it never happened.
fast foward to today, ive lost about all my life savings ($200k.)
just before writing this i lost $15k today trying to make it all back. of course it didn't happen.
i have attended 1 gamblers anonymous meeting a month ago and vowed to never gamble again but somehow even when i ban myself, i always find a way to play again.
i never would wish this addiction upon anyone as it has ruined my life in literally 3 months.
i do have a decent paying job but after taxes this still is about 3 years worth of losses after tax. is god trying to teach me a lesson? i dont understand how i can even do this as i used to play small but after getting that win i looked as gambling as a way to win money and then kept chasing until i ended up here.
i need some advice please anything would be appreciated. i cant continue on like this. my family doesn't know and if they did idk what i would do with myself.
please someone let me know how to stop.